Wedding Etiquette Wednesday: Etiquette Myths

The rules of etiquette at weddings can sometimes be a bit confusing. There are many good suggestions out there for proper wedding etiquette, but there is also a lot of bad advice. Etiquette expert Peggy Post gives her list of common etiquette myths on the Wedding Channel’s website and we have listed a few of them below….

• Myth- A bride and groom have one year to send out thank you notes.
• False! Thank you notes should be personal and sent out in a timely manner; usually two weeks after the honeymoon and never more than three months. Make writing thank you note a fun project for you and your spouse to do together.

• Myth- The bride’s family is required to pay for most of the wedding and reception expenses.
• False! Many couples today pay for their own wedding expenses. Both the bride and groom’s families can share expenses too. However you plan on financing your wedding it is important to create a budget and communicate about costs so that you avoid overspending.

• Myth- A bride should expect her bridesmaids to host a shower for her.
• False! Sometimes it is not possible, due to any number of reasons such as financial burden or location, for bridesmaids to host a bridal shower. Brides should never ask friends to host a shower.

• Myth- A couple does not need to send out save-the-dates to guests.
• True! Save-the-dates are helpful, but not necessary. It is a nice gesture to send save-the-dates if your ceremony falls on a holiday, requires guests to travel long distance or is at a popular destination that could get booked.

• Myth- It is best to send wedding invitations on either white or ecru paper.
• False! A couples invitations should be a reflection of their personal taste and the style of their wedding. White and ecru are traditional formal invitation colors, but are not the only type of invitations to send.
• cloud 9 Papers offers a great selection of stationery for your invitations. We even offer some great eco-friendly products!

Check out Peggy Post’s complete list here…

Wedding Etiquette Wednesday: Technology

We live in a connected world. Today even elementary school students have cell phones and are more than efficient at texting and Tweeting! Along your wedding planning process you have probably made use of a few pieces of technology that have made your life a lot easier. However, when it comes to the big day, being old fashioned regarding technology is a good idea. No one wants their vows interrupted by an obnoxious ring tone. Here are some tips for modern technology at the ceremony…

Cell Phones: Your guests will have them (probably glued to their finger tips). It is a good idea to remind your guests to turn off the phones during the ceremony. Etiquette guru Emily Post suggests including a friendly request on your invitation for phones to be shut off or placing signs at the guest sign-in table or the entrances to the venue. The most effective, but also most intrusive way, would be to have an announcement made prior to the ceremony.

For guests: Texting during the ceremony is a big NO! Wait until after the ceremony before pulling out your phones to text or check messages.

Other technology: MP3 players or iPods should be left in the car, but if you do bring it please make sure to have it turned off and put away during the ceremony. This should be obvious but you would be surprised!

Wedding Etiquette Wednesday - Facebook

With Facebook more popular than ever, we found this bit of etiquette as posted on Martha Stewart Weddings to be quite interesting and relevant.

It seems like the etiquette game is constantly changing. And nowhere is that more apparent than in the digital realm. Case in point? A reader recently wrote in with the following questions:

Lots of my friends and family are on Facebook. Can I create a page just for my wedding, and post updates, etc.? Or maybe an event? Is it rude to post status updates about my wedding planning on my own wall?

Here’s the etiquette rule at play -- and it’s a biggie: It’s rude to talk about a social event in front of someone who is not invited but has reason to think they might have been.

Facebook makes this hard to apply. It's still sort of new, in etiquette terms; people develop so many differing levels of intimacy, and everyone uses Facebook differently. So be cautious with status updates, depending on who is in your “friends” list, and how it compares to who is on your guest list. A few general status updates are fine. You can’t hide the news -- just don’t dwell on it.

As for creating a page or an event: restrict these to be visible only to the “friends” who are also on your guest list. But be warned: Most people don't care about your trips to the florist or cake baker the way you do, so just keep that in mind.

c9 Weddings & Papers readers - what do you think?